from spanking the skins to wiggling the opto isolator | Main | one down, none to go

November 22, 2003

long ago and far away

for those of you who were wondering, marcin and delia are in washington, dc. been there since may, and thinking of heading to poland in may...those crazy kids...llama farming didn't work out.

if you are an earthlink subscriber, get online and change you account preferences. earthlink has changed their policy and will automatically begin collecting personal information about you, and begon to pass your info out to third parties. you have to click on three check boxes in your online prefs, and then jump through a few hoops. also yahoo will begin spamming you after january first, even if you opted out of their third party spaming program when you set up your account, so get on line and opt out again, which involves clicking to get to another page from h your prefs page, more hoops, more hoops...i think it might be time to quit yahoo altogether.

Glenn Fleishman article in the seatle times on why you shouldn't have updated to OS X Panther. vaguely chauvenistic.

Macdevcenter on rudimentary Panther system administration. i'd add getting fink and anachron, but thats me. at the very least copy the command line commands presented here and either remember to run them as needed or have iCal execute them. another fyi: you have the energy saver system preference shut off, put to sleep and or turn on the computer at any time everyday. potentially handy...

my three day hunt for my keys is over. they were found, they were returned to me, and the various people whose keys are on my chain no longer have to live in fear of changing their locks. this has been a fucking nightmare, not just because i lost both the live set i carry in my pocket and the "dead" set i keep in the bag, but because of the betrayal of trust and lack of responsibility it engendered. other people were effected. they're both in my pocket now, and i can finally get some sleep. then there was the cost of running around and personally checking all the places i had been since i knew i last had them, and the cost of getting them back. i have $1.50 to my name. sigh. something better come up fast, or there won't be a ffej posting here soon.

Posted by parody at November 22, 2003 10:45 PM

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Rumors rumors, Most of the pilsen crew tunes in here if you here anything that I said that you did'nt hear from me, its BULL SHIT!!!!! I am sick of this fucking shit, Because oh 10 people said well Bull Shit Travels in packs that how bull shit starts. So Vito (asshole) I know he does,nt read here but if any one has vito email post and clip and send this to the fucker.

Vito you fucked up!, another one of my friendships over your fucking lie's. I can't believe they believe your bull shit, but then you pass your bull shit every where to every one, that repeats it. Well Fuck You, Vito, Pay Back Time. And I do not play nice. I am going to kick your fucking ass!!!

Please someone foward that to vito email box. I do not have it,but one of you here does please. thanks oman

Posted by: oman at November 23, 2003 10:46 AM

You know, once you threaten someone in public, you are foolish to carry it out

Posted by: Oakey at November 23, 2003 02:34 PM

Llamas!??! You're kidding right?

Posted by: Gessner at November 23, 2003 03:48 PM

llamas another animal pyramid scheme

Posted by: Oakey at November 23, 2003 06:59 PM

llamas or emus, i never could remember. but yeah, no lie.

oman, you don't need a defrocked goatlicking lawyer to tell you that. new ffejworld rule: no threats, unless i make them. you can get in a lot of trouble threatening people, even worthless sacks of shit like vito.

look, everyone knows he's a worthless emotional vampire, a chaos junkie and a groupie, to name a few of his more printable features. any friendship you lost to one of his malicious overtures is one well lost, because anyone who'd listen to or believe his whale dreck is bent to say the least, and probably of like ilk. or worse, or maybe just hyper naive and stupid. either way, to be culled. now i'm aware that some people just think he's unsocialized and immature, but i've met his brother and sister, and i got to tell you he either works hard at being an asshole, or is developementally disabled. he's had 40 or so years to cleen up his act, and he hasn;t. if he is developmentally dissabled, well columbia does have a hire the handicapped rule, and he could be their entire affirmative action program. i'm not required by law to put up with him, and neither is anyone else. but asskicking would go out the window for sure, it would make you look like the president, who tended to execute the retarded--in a few famous cases he executed people who saved part of their last meal for after the execution...

beating up on the retarded is just awefull.

besides which, where are you going to do it? at columbia? jailtime for certain. at lamprey? you get your ass banned and i'd be forced to take you down, as part of my official duties. the nexus? again, bannishment, plus making eric and todd whup you. bridgeport? some xenophobic neighbor would either wack you or call the cops. most likely the former, along with all their family and friends. sso jail or a chain beating. you lose more then the sack of shit, who'd still have free range. and who'd gloat.

he's like that, and use it.

i recomend you just never speak to him againk, other then to say, "get the fuck away from me, you evil prickless vampire." no other threats are necessary,

just say no to vito.

if more people did, the world, or at least our little corner of it would be a better, quieter, roomier place. and less threatening to woman. and smell better.

Posted by: ffej at November 23, 2003 08:05 PM

As long as you're going to wail away on this guy, anybody care to give a ferinstance or two?

I'm not defending, just curious. What do you mean by vampire?

It brings to mind the crypt where Nixon is buried. How odd that the 24-hour honor guard carries wooden stakes and mallets in their holsters instead of guns. Why are the doorlocks installed backwards?

What's the deal with this Vito guy? All I knew about him was that he did a poetry thing at the Pilsen Cafe and later at Chela Joe's.

Posted by: Anonymous at November 23, 2003 11:06 PM

well, it's a time location joke. or rather if sometime your stuck in the same location as him, it's no joke. and no one is going to wail on his lame carcass, they'd get it on them. in the spirit of those internable term papers i was once forced to write by his ilk (twice in one week!) i present vito...

vito is:

the longest five days you ever spent in a two minute conversation.

a sexual predater wannabe

a failed groupie

the 300 pound hulking oaf who is trying to touch you, interupt your conversation, chat up your girl, tell you something you already know, whine, suck the fun or life out of you or pour water in your laptop.

always trying to steal someone's cachet.

a maliciouss gossip.

someone one who revels in malicious gossip.

just another waste of space who won't go away, a creature who loves to annoy and loves the chaos he sows.


possibly developmentally dissabled, but we're not willing to spend money on the tests, so no whumping on the poor retard on the odd chance he is, ok?

further deponent sayeth not, till i clear it with my lawyer.

he's a pain in the ass, and i hate like hell to protect him from the mob, but as long as there is the slightest chance he's retarded, i can't let anyone beat on him. repeat, no beating. of course if he'd come forward with proof that he isn't dissabled, i'll happily stand out of the way and let the dolts drag him behind the stolen car of their choice. unless they do it at lamprey, and then, well, it'll be messy.

frankly, i have nothing against personally, except for the three hours i once spent explaining to him over and over and over exactly how and why he annoyed me and other people, and why he should stop it. and he got a big woody and stepped it up.

he's rather like oakey, except he's has no where near the brain power, none of the wasted potential, no where near the courage, none of the twisted charisma, and come to think about, he's nothing like oakey at all, except size wise.

Posted by: ffej at November 23, 2003 11:41 PM

forgot to mention his voice, which is fingernails on a black board to me....

(yes jimbo, that was a left handed compliment or three)

and under the truth in advertising law, i gotta tell you i'm an asshole too. but i'm honest about it.

Posted by: ffej at November 23, 2003 11:45 PM

well I might have over reacted at that time........................................................... ? NO! I did'nt but the new rules are clear only one has the right to be first in line for the ass whopping, FFEJ, save me sloppy seconds! save some a#@ whipping for me, he has made the hole deeper scense earlyer today, and some people resected their local watering hole so a nice f@3k off work dam good, only thing a little mouse gave it away. But then it worked because he left very fast, maybe he will stay away for a while?! I am done with this subject all mighting and powerful, FFEJ.

Posted by: Martin Jackson at November 24, 2003 02:20 AM

Thanks Ffej (I think) although I am wondering what I did to deserve it.

Bu the way I am not defrocked I am frocked, although sometimes more than others.

Also i do not lick goats, don't have goats. I have pigs. I do cuddle with the pigs I do not lick them. My dog has a fondness for the new pig and he licks him, but I can not be resposible for the licks my dog gives.

Posted by: Oakey at November 24, 2003 10:48 AM

I saw Oakey licking goats, with my own eyes. He lies.

Posted by: Veto at November 24, 2003 06:27 PM

ok ok my kids mom is pretty goat e and I licked her a few times

Posted by: Oakey at November 24, 2003 07:44 PM

I still don't get it.

You gotta have a short, concise line to lay on the guy right after the bitchslap and before the sadistic punching and kicking starts, no?

When you say "Hey, muthafucka, take dis for dat," you gotta know what "dat" is all about.

Being a womanizing prick wanabe with no balls and his head up his ass doesn't make this guy much different than 99.9 percent of the rest of the vermin who infest this sorry excuse for a community, and that includes a lot of the carpet munching women, too.

So what's the main -- or most recent at least -- reason for hating this Vito guy?

Lemme guess here. I'll bet it's not because he's fat and bald with a small dick.

Then what else is it? Get specific.

Then get in shape. I say anybody who talks this much trash is a pussy if they aren't willing to physically fight.

Whew, I can see a title match here with Ffej smashing out the windshield of Professor Woppo's ride at the red light at 18th and Halsted, then diving through the broken hole to start strangling him.

The Guinea reaches under his seat for a mouldy KFC bag with a greasy plastic knife which he skillfully jams up Ffej's nostril.

So far, it sounds like a tie and some jolly good entertainment.

Make your case with some specifics, tough guys.

Posted by: Anonymous at November 24, 2003 11:40 PM

Street fights are stupid. Don't do it, Oman. And I aint just talking about the law, or about him hurting you.

If you're not very careful, you could kill him, and then the rest of your life would be seriously fucked up -- come to think of it, it could be seriously fucked up if you just hurt him.

Too often, we forget that we really don't want to hurt someone else, even if it seems they might deserve it.

The last two street fights I got into, I came very close to killing people, and I wasn't even trying hard. Sure, they were both self-defense, so I might have had legal justification. And, in fact, in one case, I was trying my level best not to hurt the guy, but rather just to restrain him. But things happen fast in a street fight, and a kick to the chest can result in pneumothorax, and a head-lock can become a choke-hold, without you even realizing what you're doing (precisely what happened with me.)

I look back on those near-death experiences (for the other guy), and they scare the hell out of me. When confronted with a street fight, I try my best to lower the temperature. If that doesn't work, I run.

The human body is very delicate. You may set out just to teach him a lesson, but end up with a corpse on your hands.

Fuck macho -- it just gets you in trouble. Be smart, and protect yourself. Avoid street fights any way you can. NEVER start one.

There are other, smarter, ways to deal with people who make trouble for you.

Posted by: Jerry at November 25, 2003 11:38 AM

shit, what is it about aol the removes the ability to read, and comprehend english? i say no ass whipping and a chain fight is proposed, over and over, i say no threatening other then by me, and everyone starts threatening everybody. and then then some idiot has to throw bigoted slang about the place...

idiots. learn to read, and behave.

and watch the ethnic slurs and derogatory slang, kiddies, or the comments go bye bye.

i just removed another nigerian 417 spammer from the comments, which really pisses me off. and now this.

Posted by: ffej at November 26, 2003 12:05 AM

Okay, I never liked Vito either, but Ffej and jerry are right, and, although the diatribe above is nominally amusing I have to say y'all seem to have a bit too much time on your hands. So...

I propose a campaign. How about VETO VITO bumper stickers and posters and campaign signs? I'm sure that at least someone in pilsen could draw a fairly accurate, disgusting charicature of the putz (mickey rat meets count chocula) and with a couple silk screens and bunch of paper and wheat paste you can at least let everyone know how you feel.

Feel free to come up with all the slogans you desire, but i favor:

(jerry, your latin has to be better than mine...i'm aiming for "i cam a saw, i grossed everyone out totally)

i could go on, but since the dope is 400 miles away, he really doesn't bug me as much as he used to.

Posted by: john at November 27, 2003 12:08 AM

You guys have too much time on your hands, and Vito's such an easy target, I'm surprised that he can get people so upset. Why not spend your time going after Bush or another "true" asshole?

Pilsen East could be one of the great creative centers of the U.S. if all of the people here weren't so fucked up all the time (by that I mean having more of a focus on drugs/booze/partying than art), as well as being focused more on what other people are doing than on what you're doing yourself. This has to be the most incestual community I've ever seen ... on the other hand, I do like the fact I can walk down the street and recognize and chit-chat with my neighbors.

Posted by: Juiceman at December 4, 2003 12:56 PM

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